Should I stop blogging

Should I stop blogging, is this too sad for you? Are you judging me? Did this really happen? How can you still be after living through it?

Can we still be a family? Please? Don’t die. I don’t know what I would be without you. Is this too much?

If I tell you what has been going on for me, for us, will you pity us? Treat us differently?

Will you employ me? Will you talk to me in the hall, in the office, in the cafeteria? In my person, my happy face, my darkest place…

Round and round and round and round…

But I blog. Because IT will not win. I will be me. Shame and all. Tears and all. Hate and all.

And even though IT thinks it is all my fault, that I am talking too loud, that you might shy from me, that I might be alone. That we might be alone.

And then what?

6 thoughts on “Should I stop blogging

  1. Your journey is ongoing and each writing episode gives us an insight into how through your suffering and struggles to fight this illness you are gaining strength and purpose. Love you for your openness and honesty and for letting us in, am proud to know you.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. There is absolutely no shame my friend – you have been on one of the hardest roads to travel, no fault of yours.. PPP n PPD are real tough conditions. I hope you can feel n know that you have much empathy n encouragement, love n support. Keep looking at your beautiful Mr X n Mr A. The loves of your life – in person n in the photos on your phone – they will give you strength. You are a beautiful person and a great mum…. Take heart, take all the support you can get, know you are loved. It will get better. I am happy to chat anytime too. Sending you a big hug n much love.

    Liked by 1 person

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